theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
