Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
