Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
