There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
