Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I am available for nakedness
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
