Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
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