do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
