Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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