can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
