i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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