What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize