You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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