im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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