every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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