We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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