worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
