I heard we made out
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
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