yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
