i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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