your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Alive.
So much puke
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
