Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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