she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
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does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
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Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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