real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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