If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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