My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Found the puke drawer
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
