I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
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