Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
