what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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