I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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