Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
COCAINE IS GR8
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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