i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
