She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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