walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
