My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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