Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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