I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
