There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
