Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
