I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
