Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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