She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
