how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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