That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
The police scanner is talking about you again....
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
