lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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