Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
