Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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