P.S. I can't hear my feet
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
