Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
