For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
