it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Randomize
