Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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