Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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