You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
well you can't waste a boner
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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